The Grains of Sand


Far be it for me to know to pretend

That I have a grasp on truth

For with all that I learn in a single day

A million things pass over my roof


And yet I can say these things I believe

Though the list would increase so quick

That I could never innumerate them

For time passes as a greasy slick


And so more things go over my head

Than I could ever hope to reveal

I therefore can only speak of things

That pass just as I do through the real


Clutching at this or that as I go

Gluing it down with my word

Hoping that someone sees it and heeds

Just like me, something that I heard


And so an apt epithet for me

Would be only that I came and I left

And over the rocky surface of life

I stuck some thoughts in a cleft


Barbara Blackcinder

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Evening Into Night


Darkness has fallen, the night sky is here

Lighted only by the horizoned sun

It’s glow only on things near


The breeze while silent during the light

Just as steadily blows now

Louder passing through the trees in the night


A distant frog calls for a mate

Echoing through the tree tops

Hoping it won’t have long to wait


Even the car tires sounds as they pass

Diminishes quickly with distance now

Lost in the swishing, back and forth fields of grass


I listen while on the edge of the dark

But my eyes and head are drowsy and tired

I must arise and leave the park


But it’s too relaxing and I waver

Soon asleep as quietly I lay

The evening now the night that I savor


I awaken with the chill of the mist

Dampening my shirt and face

Like a spitting serpent who has hissed


But crawl I must from my bed of grass

To go through life once more

With no sleep to conceal the past


I think instead of the peaceful calm

Of the settling night closing down

As it rested me, deep in its palm


Barbara Blackcinder

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In Your Face


You say that all news is about gays today

Not that you object to their lifestyle per se

It’s just that it seems to be always in your face

But can you allow any discriminatory trace?


What would you think if you were born years ago?

When it was Women’s Rights in the show

To the extent that they created an amendment

That had little to do with their first true sentiments


Both of these have to do with human rights

Getting them into the Christian gun sights

Holding their morals, as incongruent though they be

With the reality of lives as they look to me


“We don’t like same sex marriages or gays” you say

Slogans that seem to say what you really do hate

Which is anyone that is different in your view

Anyone who is not precisely just like you


With trying to be holy by saying you forgive

Doesn’t mean that you will let them live

Persecutions and deaths around the world

Building from the slogans that you frequently hurled


To justify your religion’s motive and overbearing drive

You cling to the myth that your god is still alive

That he knows the truth and has given it to you

But that book is put together without any glue


It was written and compiled long before science

When not accepting religion was a deadly defiance

Long before we could know the truth of our genetics

Because man was a group of scientific diabetics


Well life goes on, and on, and on

Forming ripples in the singular pond

Spreading out and meeting resistances

Sometimes calling from nearby distances


We all have to cope with what we don’t like

Even when they, not us, are given the mike

To say what it is you don’t want to hear

Even though what is it is isn’t necessarily clear


It’s all a part of life as we trudge through

And we hope that it’ll be good for you

Until then we watch while they gain

As we all work together towards being sane


Barbara Blackcinder

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Bar Time


Oh where are you my absent friend?

The one I’ve looked for forever

It seems that I shall never find you

But my hopes shall end, never


It’s not a wife that I seek at all

I have one of those already

But I need more of a companion

Someone to knock around with steady


Just to hang out, to waste some time

To do nothing more than order beer

With no intentions of doing squat

Just sit on this barstool right here


To let the airs of life depart

Disappear behind the glass

To take in all the stupid ideas

Straight from each other’s ass


No common sense needs to be shown

Nor logic or even a hint at smarts

Just some background noise, no more

With a few belches and maybe some farts


Barbara Blackcinder

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A Sadness Overwhelming


It’s life itself that makes me so sad

Longing for this, missing what I had

It’s looking back at things that were done

And some that weren’t and may have been fun

Sometimes it hurts to look back and see

Various aspects that I wish weren’t me

Things that caused me to act certain ways

Resulting in things missed in those days

Paths that I’ve taken and I wished I hadn’t

Directions my fears as I was then, and so sent


All I can do is pull in my thoughts

Forget all those haves and have-naughts

Put away the sadness of times gone

Escape from depression for things that I long

Wishes that will never be seen by me

Fears that directed away from that I won’t see

Because it is all fruitless to live in the past

Life is so short and not so much left to last

When instead we need to look just ahead

Instead of where life has already lead


Barbara Blackcinder

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A Good Thing Gone Bad


I once thought, that it was a good thing

To have an open forum, where everyone could sing

Where people could say just what they thought

But I was wrong, oh how I was taught.


First of all I guessed, that people were quite smart

That talking, and reasoning, was a universal art

That making conversation was nearly second nature

But instead it seems that thought is nothing like mature


Instead of hearing discussions with intelligent design

It seems rather that it was an illusion of mine

I expected people to have a sense of reason

But instead it was blathering and spite for the season


It goes around the give and take of conversation

Common sense seems to have absolutely no gestation

We listen to the most insane claim given as fact

Even when the speaker is nothing short of whacked


The same lack of quality discussion keeps repeating

Facts and truth and honesty take a deadly beating

Only what is said to further our own opinions

Is listening to, many times, by self-serving minions


So it is the internet which has the means to enlighten us

Delivers nothing more useful than a handful of sour pus

A sickened disease full of hatred, lies and deceit

From pretentious scum looking for receipts


To stop this endless rambling of psychopathic drool

Learning to discern truth from fact needs to suffer school

Instead of believing that which is repeated without end

Thinking must be instituted before we hit the button ‘send’


Barbara Blackcinder

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No Choice In The Matter


It really does not matter

Just how I choose to go

It was never really my choice

It was decided long ago


I began as everyone did

A new birth and a new soul

I was but a small baby

I had only to live as my goal


But somewhere I began to change

Differences became evident

Somehow I have different feelings

Than those supposedly “Heaven sent”


Some would have you believe

That my genetics were a lie

That I could become normal

If only I would give it a try


But such is not the case

I tried and suffered a cure

But I could not deny my self

My own soul was the lure


It told me what I wanted

Though it was not the same

As those who claimed to know

The only path through the game


They chose to ostracize me

To pick and choose what I felt

That I would be cured by faith

That I would change as I knelt


But no matter how severe

No matter how I tried

My personal anguish and pain

Could not change what I hide


So now you chose to condemn me

For something I cannot deny

For not having pat answers

When you ask me stridently, why?


I can’t answer why I like something

As contrary and painful to be

Due to the lack of understanding

Of what it is to be me


I do not ask your forgiveness

For that would be to admit

That somehow I am wrong

As though that would simply end it


I am what I am and no other

I simply see things my way

Just as others see their life

And struggle through it every day


While I may accept sympathy for my suffering

I do not accept it because of my faults

There is nothing about me to change

No matter the strength of your assaults


And so I will go through with my life

The only way that’s right for me

Because it is what my mind and body

Have told me the way it must be


Barbara Blackcinder

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